Sunday, September 27, 2009

Elmer Wayne Has Left the Building!

We’ve been inundated with questions about the delay of “Cigs and Whiskey”, and so we’ve decided to spill the scoop. Elmer Wayne has decided to leave the band, and we are using fill-in bass players until a permanent replacement can be found.
He was doing fine, until one of his weekly tequila and mescaline “treatments” (as he calls them) climaxed in his revelation that he is the reincarnation of Ayn Rand. Consequently, and because he believes his former life-self ordered him to, he has decided to give up music and run for public office on his own ultra Libertarian ticket. We have to give him credit for not chomping away at bigger cud than he can chew, since he has decided to pursue a seat at the Commissioners’ table in Dimmit County, Texas (of course).
The loss isn’t that great, really and what we really need is a singer. Elmer Wayne said he would stay and forgo his political ambition if he could have that job, but his rendition of “You’re So Vain” left everyone a little cold. Chloe has taken a stab or two at singing before, and her voice is good, but she would probably draw even more lonely, horny (the ones young enough to be) men to the gigs and we have enough of those already. And, being a New York Yankee, she sounds more Long Island than Llano Estacado, anyway.

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Monday, September 21, 2009

The Aftermath

As most of you know, the "Last Days in Hell End of Summer Fest" at the Quanah, TX Allsups parking lot was a great event. Unfortunately our photographer, Woodrow Shankshaw, didn't make it past Friday night's Tailgate Happy Hour kickoff and woke late Sunday afternoon. So documentation of the performances of our boys, as well as a blistering set by the Burnin' Hellbillies, the uplifting vocal stylings of Brother Cletus' Church Key Choir and the pole dancing talents of the Hotpoint Rangerettes will have to consist of tales told over firepits and shared tequila for years to come. Woodrow did drag his sorry self back from his motel poolside lounger soon enough to get shots of the aftermath, which we've included here. We were long gone, of course, and it appears the trash collection detail was even more tardy than Woody.
We're back in the studio, hoping to finish up "Cigs and Whiskey" in time for its insertion into Christmas stockings all over the civilized world, and a good chunk of the uncivilized world we seem to find ourselves in most of the time.
Till next we meet, good rockin', faithful fans!

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